A Fifty-Year-Old Secret Can Now Be Told
Posted: Thursday, October 30, 2008
by Marty RicKard
Editor's Note: Years ago, a friend helped me, but he made me promise to say nothing. For fifty years I kept that secret, but now it is time to tell.
Hattiesburg 's Kenny Duff was a good man. I was saddened to learn of his recent death. Kenny and I shared an unusual bond that no else was aware of. He asked me to keep a secret in 1960. I honored that request, but I know he wouldn't mind if I told the story now. It is a good story about a kind person, and it should be told.
Kenny was the son of Joe Duff, owner of a successful amusement company in Hattiesburg , Mississippi . Kenny worked hard in his family's business.
We met on the Southern campus in 1960, and for some reason we clicked. He asked me to go out for rush. I didn't even know what he was talking about. I thought rush was what you did when you were late for dinner. He explained the fraternity system to me. I decided to do it. Kenny steered us toward the ATO fraternity, in which he was active.
I pledged ATO and Kenny became my Big Brother. It wasn't easy for him. I had many problems. I drank too much, blacked out and never knew what I had done until about noon the next day when the brothers told me. I am part American Indian and loved to become blood brothers with friends. I have about a dozen blood brothers and sisters scattered around the nation.
One night we went to the emergency room. I cut Mother Watts's arm too deeply and he was lying on the ER table getting it stitched up. More PR work for Kenny, but he saved me again. Don't ask me why.
If I had had any other Big Brother to guide me through, I never would have made it. There were times when it was touch-and-go, but Kenny's booming, bass voice and his none- to-gentle persuasion got me through. Kenny didn't back down from anyone, and there were several "anyones" who didn't think I would make a good ATO.
I'm a little sketchy on the actual figures, but I think the ATO initiation fee was $60 or $65. Of course, this amount seems miniscule now, but in 1960 it was a ton of money. The Consumer Price Index (CPI) says that $60 in 1960 equates to about $600 today.
I was on a journalism scholarship which required me to work all night on Tuesdays and Wednesdays to get out the Student Printz newspaper. I got paid every two weeks, but most of the money went straight to the school. After school expenses, I had around four dollars left over. (Our CPI says that is about $28 in current cash).
As time drew nigh to pay the initiation fee, I told Kenny that I couldn't pay it.
"I'm going to drop out of the fraternity," I told him.
"Like hell you are," he replied.
I explained my finances to him. I could have gotten more sympathy out of a rock.
"Get in my truck," he said.
"Where are we going?"
Kenny didn't answer the question, but kept up a tirade about "we're too close now for you to drop out, you dumb SOB." Downtown, we parked in front of the Household Finance Company.
We went inside.
"He needs $60," Kenny nodded at me.
"I can't do this, Kenny."
They handed me an application.
Ten minutes later, my application was rejected.
"He'll need a co-signer," the lady said.
Kenny co-signed the papers.
I left with $60 and a knot in my belly.
"What if I can't pay it?"
"You'll pay it," Kenny growled. "You need ATO and we need you. You'll pay it."
It wasn't so much a statement, but an order.
"Thanks for the help, Kenny."
"Just one thing," he said.
"What?"
"Let's just keep this deal between us---don't tell anyone."
"OK," I said.
As far as I know, nobody ever knew that Kenny made it possible for me to be an ATO. And he never mentioned it again to me.
Over the years I have thought about his request that I tell no one. First, I thought he didn't want a bunch of pledges bugging him to co-sign notes. But later, I believe that I stumbled upon the correct reason. He was wise and kind enough to know that that information would only diminish me in the eyes of our brothers.
But Kenny wasn't finished being kind. About once a week he came over to the ATO house and asked me if I could help him. I went with him to some unbelievable locations far out in the woods over rutted, red dirt paths wide enough in most places to accommodate just one vehicle. These were amazing places, mostly black, and he talked to these people like they were kinfolk. Kenny always paid me a little for this, and I applied it to my loan.
A slight reduction in my beer consumption coupled with Kenny's cash transfusions, helped me pay off my loan to HFC before the year ended.
When I told Kenny that Janice and I were going to get married over Christmas vacation, he asked what I was going to do for a bachelor's party.
"Nothing," I said. "No money."
"You've got to have a party, for God's sake," he said.
So Kenny hosted at his parents' home perhaps the most amazing party in Hattiesburg history. We carried beer in for a couple of days. It seemed like a hundred guys attended. We drank all the beer and then started on his father's booze. The last thing I recall is sitting in a large circle passing bottles. I think there were bodies regaining consciousness around that house for three days afterward.
And Kenny told me that his dad had been saving some special bottle of booze for his wedding anniversary. It too had been consumed. I'm not sure what happened when his parents returned from a trip to discover that the special bottle of booze had disappeared.
So that's the story Kenny asked me not to tell. I loved Kenny Duff. He was a fine man, a kind man. What he did had a great influence on my life. It taught me many lessons about friendship.
I would not be an ATO were it not for Kenny Duff. I'm seventy years old and my associations over the years with fraternity brothers have been pleasant and beneficial. I owe that to Kenny. It was always fun to stop and see Kenny and his wife Kay when I passed through Hattiesburg .
Marty RicKard Bio
Marty RicKard attended William Penn College , Iowa State University and University of Southern Mississippi , from which he holds a BS degree in journalism and photojournalism. He also has a Masters Degree in photography, in addition to the Craftsman, CPP, and A-ASP degrees. Marty spent two years as a technical writer for White Motor Company, and has worked for the Charles City Press, Mason City Globe-Gazette, and Davenport Times-Democrat. He was co-owner of the weekly New Sharon Star, where he was twice named Iowa Master Columnist for his article, which was syndicated in twenty Iowa newspapers. For more than a decade Marty's regular column appeared in the Professional Photographer magazine. He has been published in many other magazines and newspapers, including Writer's Digest, Writer Advice, Golf Digest, Resource Magazine, Picture, Range Finder, and Darkroom. In addition to his writing credits, Marty has won numerous photography awards, has lectured in 48 states, and has traveled internationally as lecturer, and judge. He was one of thirty from the U.S. to participate in the first cultural exchange with China in 1986. He currently is a full-time writer of fiction and poetry. He is the author of two poetry books and one volume of short stories. He is an entertaining speaker.
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Top-level comments on this article: (5 total)Wonderful story, thanks for sharing.l
Love and Respect! Great story!
I loved the story! Love & Respect brother. Delta Eta chapter.Dear Michael: It's a little story, but it changed my life. Love and Respect, brother. Epsilon Upsilon . Marty RicKard
Nice story! L&R
Exactly what ATO is about. True Gentlemen. L&R. Beta Tau
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